My “sob story” as it was called….

Dear Guillianna and Elijah-

I can’t t imagine anyone ever saying this is my  “sob story” – when in actuality it’s your life story from birth to ages 7 and 9 years of age!    Oh my – such a wonderful  and happy time it truly was for all of us!    These memories are not sad – if there is any impression  of a “sob story” the reality is that the observance may be by those it label these images these words these memories as such would be their own self introspection.   Maybe the idea that mom and dad could not share those memories because of work demands is their own sorrow and maybe after all these years – after missing so much time , it has caught up and the action was to force detachment and gain the attachment they wanted and missed.    That is possible and we may never know why or what triggered this, but a “sob story” it will not ever be!    The story of your lives is a wonderfully happy and love filled journey to be told it was anything else or manipulated to believe you were victims in any way , is what is truly sad.    The source of any “sorrow” is in the decisions that were made  to alienate or remove from your life all that was ever known by the twice of you – and it’s our sincere hope that all you loved and knew as home, and extended family and friends have been replaced with the continued love of parents and new adventures that will leave  your lives enriched.   Not by destroying the good memories you have had but by building upon them and allowing you to live the lives you have known.     If “my story” seems, or is interpreted as a “sob story” it’s likely that the weight of the guilt associated with knowing that these actions that have been taken , will one day result in ownership of the heartbreak that was brought upon you , us, and all those who have loved and continue to love you .     Nana and Poppy’s actions as your grandparents are and always were – pure love ❤️  for you both and we have tried  to help mom as she navigated through her own childhood into her adult years.   Without fail- we have loved her – we have done our very best to always try to  support her, and the sorrow is not in our choice to do so- it may be in her choice to negate it and “ cut out of her life” – a father who only ever was wonderful to her and the mom who she never wanted after losing her own.     The sob story may just be – that she knows that all of the family – the core people of her entire life in the Mitten, have never done her an injustice, but it seems to this date , her own personal issues prevent her from ever acknowledging anyone of us as having value in her life- she enjoys believing she has made it through all of her life all on her own – painting the image that she had no help, and the idea that she has ever depended upon anyone to help her – didn’t or doesn’t fit into the realm of her version of a  “story”.    When or if ever  adults can recognize the simple truth,  that it truly does take a village – to survive this crazy world – love of friends, teachers,  family , relatives and support from every direction,  then and only then,  will it be understood by our own daughter that there is no need to name call, no need to falsely accuse, no need to isolate, and treat others with malice and hopefully one day acknowledge and actually understand that love is not something to toss aside, that we as parents…  are in fact two people who did the very best they possibly could to protect, preserve, provide and help grow intellectually and emotionally all six of their children and all of their grandchildren to date.     At present  – there are those who look to find the hate,  the discord, the sorrow, in things —— unlike those who choose to see love ❤️     Any sorrow, negativity or falsehood that could ever be ingrained since leaving the Mitten, into two innocent people,  is not my “sob story” it is the sad and heartbreaking story that hurts the innocent, and it is fabricated by others who chose to create this unthinkable situation to mask their own parental insecurity .   Painting the image you were victims during your Mitten years , is not at all a truth, however, becoming the victim of loss of control, loss of memories and familial support, loss of relationships, learning how to “cut people” you loved deeply “out of your lives”  is a role you each have fallen into by the actions of others , and THAT is the sorrow,  that  has become Poppy and Nana’s reality – as well as yours.  Sob story?  Wow,   Pretty sure that is a very callous term and derogatory way to look at what it is to make  an innocent child a victim, of loss and separation.     The other day Poppy and Nana were thinking – about the way you’d likely feel next time we see you … what would you feel if we were to visit now?    In recent months –  we have respected the demand to not send cards to you , not send gifts, and when we asked to come see you , we were denied-  but if we had come , or came to visit other family near by that you’re also forbidden to see- , and saw your Nana and Poppy, would you  be afraid of disappointing your own parents when you truly just wanted to run and hug your grandparents?   Oh my,  the mental anguish that would be present in that moment.   Oh my goodness,  the anguish that will be present over the many years to come if you’re  left wondering , or allowed to believe your Poppy and Nana are something harmful, that we are somehow people who didn’t love, who didn’t give all they could  to their children and to their grandchildren?     To think your own parents would make their children actually believe that they either endured something bad, or that they were so insignificant that they were forgotten, isn’t that the most sorrowful scenario  ?   There is not resolution for you to have peace in your futures, if honesty and integrity are  lacking, or if some sort of personal anguish of others, is now being spread to the innocent.   So for today all we can do, all we can hope is that you will remain strong, have faith in your truths and your real memories of our actions and of all our time in the Mitten – if they can be preserved either within you or by way of these images, they will one day serve you well and one day those who have controlled thoughts, your hearts –   will free them,  And you will  feel the love of all your family – know and understand  thatclove if parents and family is a good and wonderful thing for each of you .  The actions of people – show more about a person’s character than anything I could ever say.     In everything we have ever done with regard to our children and grandchildren we have done so with the purest form of love – ALWAYS and as to the two of you  in our lives , we have always wanted to help our daughter, and to help you both,  please know- these photos , these memories – are not a “sob story”-  it is a beautiful love that has seemingly been turned into something untrue.  The character of a man like your Poppy cannot be altered by words –   His character is shown in his actions.  One day you’ll see all of the facts , gain your own perspective and in that you will find that love, dedication and kindness define your story – and our story is a love story , what others have chosen to do with our love is their story – and they Amy call it what they will.    It won’t ever change our “love you to the moon and back, love story”.

We love you both to the moon and back

forever and for always

XOXOXOXOXOXO

❤️Nana and Poppy ❤️?

By Nana

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