There is some snow headed to the Mitten which makes for thinking of warm sunny places ! And as memories of summers or trips to places where palm trees grow are seen in the photos of you both – it warms a cold day. Just like seeing images of happier days warms the heart. We are always wishing for you both – happiness . The same wish we share for every grandchild, every child and for our parents.
In everyone’s lives there are good days and there are days where things can be seemingly more difficult than the years should be …. when things seem hard or challenging, when change seems out of reach – we look to get thru one moment at a time, another day at a time, and we focus on the good. We hope you will one day have all these good and happy memories and so many more new memories that you’re making, to help you on your journey through life. To be loved, to feel loved, to share love and know happiness! This is and always will be our wish for you both and for all our grandchildren and children!
The week has almost passed – and for Poppy it has been almost 13 months since he has seen your faces. The last time Nana saw you it was when you were permitted to FaceTime and while talking Poppy was at work. You were told that “ It was 7:30 at night and a school night and time for bed” so permission to call over to his phone was denied. Guillianna asked “can we call him in the morning on the way to school?” He never got the call, and he has been waiting ever since. He as much as for you one day, takes these love letters to heart, looks at the images and thinks only of good! He wishes only for happiness.
Being a parent is about understanding love, knowing that children need so many things as they grow into adults. Not simply material things, physical things – not only solid, tangible, foundational things; they need things that can be found in these photos. The human interaction of those who love them and who have played key roles in their lives. Those who will enter their world and play key roles in their lives. They need laughter. They need familiarity. They need to know how to attach, to trust and to live with others despite differences. Both Nana and Poppy know that one day you will be grown. There will never be a day where you will ever doubt the love in our hearts. There will be a day where you understand the historical timeline and are able to see that loving your mom and dad as well as loving all the family who loves you is ok. It will be okay for you to be yourselves, while still being loving and kind and respectful to your parents, and also love all those currently removed from your lives. They say that time is the best teacher , and time will prove to you that love is far-reaching, it is gratifying, and it is okay to show love and respect for those you feel that connection to. To allow any prior trauma, fear of loss, absence of those you love, trust issues, to emerge, or to cause heartache or dysfunction in your adult years would be a travesty this site our words to you a hopeful tool for you both. For you have not lost anyone in the Mitten or elsewhere. You can trust and believe in the good memories and the feelings you’ve always known and seen – The images in your soul could diminish as you grow but thirst love letters these faces can be so insightful to you both and can help you release truth and have peace knowing we all understood, wanted your lives to be happy and will patiently wait for time to help pave a road for you both to happy childhood memories and the foundation you were given in the Mitten. All the friends and family you had made as small children here, carry love and well wishes for you both that are sincere and deeply embodied within you both ! We love you both to the moon and back –
We have made it to the middle of another week! You may be preparing for vocabulary tests or practicing spelling words. Maybe you are learning all about history and science, or you may be having new experiences in art class and learning so many new things. As a general rule growing up is all about asking questions and learning …. The one question you may have, that seems to have no answer is “why?” Why did this happen? Why can’t we call, see or love Nana and Poppy without making anyone else sad? Why did Nana and Poppy let this happen? Why didn’t anyone stop it ? Why doesn’t mommy want to love her parents? Why is it our memories and love for Nana and Poppy are good but we no longer see them? Forever people have wondered Why all of the bad things in the world even happen at all? There are so times in life we ask why? And you could ask 10 different people about any one of those “why” questions and potentially get 10 different responses to each question. All we are able to do in this world of so many questions is seek answers, seek truth, hope for love and live with integrity. We try our very best improve, or help make the life we live, the community we live in, a little better, a little more kind, offer something that improves humanity.
To touch the life of a person and hopefully make it better or enrich it in some way- that is who your Nana and your Poppy would hope to live their lives, our mission , and it is truly how we feel. Yet not how we are presently perceived by your parents based upon their actions and treatment of us as your grandparents. It is said when someone wants to hurt another persons feelings , is unkind, or does something that cannot be understood – it could stem from something within that person themselves. When Poppy and I ask “why? “ would a child of ours want to do something as hurtful as denying her children 2 grandparents, great grandparents, aunts uncles and cousins, us the right to share in her life or the lives of our grandchildren, the only thing we can think is how much pain that person must truly be in – to hurt so many people and say it is in anyone’s best interest is simply not true or fair.
Poppy and I both watched how your mom suffered, to be sent away for her work, there was so much pain when she had to deploy or leave you two. This website began so very long ago to keep her connected to make her see our dedication to her, to you both! ThIs whole journey with you two and your Nana and Poppy is deep-rooted in love and promises! I know there are so many things has had to endure in her life that one day you’ll understand more of. The things that are true and real, or have factual documents to support them will one day help adult versions of yourself know how truly hurt the heart of a little girl was and how sad she was by not being able to be there for so many years. Even when not deployed there were so many times where you two came to the Mitten and all the while she was working toward her degree and her job to insure your educational future and provide for you both. The love and support of all around her was constant, even if it has been minimized or unnoticed.
As a general statement, we remind ourselves that the pain or life experiences inside a person can effect the choices and direction they take. As an example, some could make decisions out of self-preservation or protection of personal fears or experiences – and some can be made out of anger, pain or even an inability to separate personal past life experience from what is current or present day experiences. Transference of these emotions can interfere with relationships and can contribute to actions that affect others. Our experience as parents and with many of the life experiences we had over the course of many years and with many children of very different personalities is only a small window looking into a vast amount of research on how drastic changes during childhood effect the grown child. And each person is individually unique as to how they cope and handle the struggles they face.
Our love for you two and this sad and heartbreaking situation of not seeing you both, are very real and will not be without issue in years to come for you both. The hope is that you will understand that EVERYONE involved truly loves you. Everyone believes they are doing what is best. Everyone is hopeful you will be happy, successful, healthy individuals. Everyone of us believes in your courage and you as individuals. It can only help you both to as adults know that you never did anything wrong. You never hurt anyone. You were without options, and in the middle of something far bigger than could be conceptualized. The break in your hearts is why we write. The fact is you’re entire world changed – and people you depended upon and hugged every night, laughed played with and trusted have become the “enemy” in your new journey. The purpose of reiterating how loved you have been, showing you the truth in images, and sparking the feelings of joy and happiness are to help you know your foundation was full of love, and so many caring and loving people. Feeling goodness, happiness as a child, prideful of the time spent with your family here in the Mitten will play into your adult lives, for if you’re to believe it was bad, or evil enough to warrant your own grandparents to be treated as though they are criminal ? Then you will have been stripped of the truth and your childhood would be marred with dysfunction that did not exist !
It is our hope that in the best possible scenario – there has been a huge misunderstanding that lead is all to this course of events – we hope that one day truth will be seen and relationships fixed. For now, we worry for you two the effect it will have upon you , we think of what must be inside of our own daughter to have her change so drastically ? We worry for her because we are her parents, and she grew up with so much family and their love surrounding her – every single day. Love she could not see nor could she trust. So many people who have helped her so many times in so many different ways , and believed love would be enough to prove to her the importance of family. People who hoped for the best and that their worth or value, and the trust being given would be accepted and appreciated. That a family would be important. Our daughter loves her children – that is undeniable. What is debated between us – seems to lay in the value she has for her own parents once her life and the lives of her children.
We all have choices to make in life, And we all make choices that don’t always prove to work out as we hope. The fact is – no matter what things may have appeared to be from the time you left the Mitten- to the day your big enough to read these love letters, no matter what you could have been led to believe or assumed as small children who only ever loved us both and wanted to say good night every night, or get hugs and kisses, good night dream starters and monitor sweet dream wishes, that would lead you to not want to see or speak to us ?, or maybe it’s more that you didn’t want to displease your parents , regardless, the fact remains…
We love you both, to the moon and back-
Poppy and I would not change anything in our lives that led us to each other, we are grateful for all of our children and the decisions we made to have a family, we would not change any decision we ever made to welcome you to know and love you as we do, and have you live with us. We would not change anything in all the years your were with us, and we know how truly happy you were during those years.
What we would hope to change in the future – is to NOT see history repeat itself- AND WOULD PREFER instead to aid in the healing of what happens when innocent children lose significant people, caregivers they love from their lives abruptly and lives get thrown into new challenges that are so different from what is known.
Knowing you have a mom who loves you both, knowing you have grandparents who love you both and sharing your lives with family that all care for you is developmentally significant. These are true facts – you have so much ahead so much to be grateful for, and so many good and wonderful things to experience. We will travel that road with you, even if only in your hearts always, and one day we will hopefully see you and spend time with you again !
For as long as we can remember both of you have been an example of kindness, love and brought so much happiness to everyone around you. We hope you continue to be the same in your day to day lives. We know that things happen in life that can change you. Especially in situations where you could feel helpless or frightened . We know that growing up is a hard job, and so is being a parent. They say the best job is being a grandparent. Poppy and I definitely ? love it. We love you both to the moon and back ! Things in the Mitten are ok, as you saw in our letter from the other day Elena turned 5! Uncle David is out of the hospital and back home ! It is his birthday today ! Your mom will have a birthday soon- and we hope you make it extra special for her. Despite what it may seem to you as small children in the current situation Nana and Poppy are sending birthday wishes to our daughter and hoping that our wish for her happiness and some sort of compromise that allows for her to see truth- hoping our wish can come true. That something changes inside of her to allow for her to see the love that is and not the contortion that have evolved. Nothing will change our wish for that kind of peace for all involved in this.
The most important thing is for you both to work very hard at school and enjoy every moment of the journey you’re on . Love with all your heart and always be kind . The days of DreamStarters, School bud driver, and all of our crazy fun and happy Sha“nana” gins, May be in the past for now but our love is not. It is reaching to the moon and back, for ever and for always,
Some photos to show a few more moments in time that bring smiles to our faces ! The hope is one day they will do the same for you both ! Bursts- of happiness like fireworks on the Fourth of July!
The days are cold here in the Mitten but the heart is warm when looking at so many images of the two of you, our other grandchildren, and our kids, as we sit and write you, we see things as they were – not as they seemly have been imagined to be by others –
The smiles, the laughter cannot be erased and while time may fade your memories of us, the truth is – you came to the Mitten so small and left at ages 9 and 6. There are a plethora of memories that are real, the shaping of the caring souls, all of the love and snuggles, the games, and playtime, the family, the friends, as well as the early years of education- all of this and more will always be a part of you.
These memories go back the beginning of your lives and will stay with us to the end of our lives and carried on by all those who ever saw Poppy and Nana hold you, play with you, love you, and put your needs above all else when mom and dad were working . Our older children can attest to the love and support given to you both to your parents. To the love and the countless attempts to show loyalty and dedication to our oldest daughter. Somewhere things have now become very misconstrued and somewhere through it – we have been labeled the people who should be banned from two little ones who only ever loved us both – our hope will always be for truth and the protection of the emotional welfare of the innocent in this.
We love you two little ones- to the moon and back-